Wednesday, November 02, 2011
A shocking phone call
I received an unexpected phone call not long ago, from Giselle's mother.
I was shocked when she broke down and cried, telling me that Giselle is pregnant again and is unable to parent the baby. She asked if Oronzo and I would want to adopt this baby, that's due in one month!!
I was not at home at the time I received the call and after ending the lengthy conversation with, "I need to talk to Oronzo and I'll call you back," I drove quickly home to do just that.
It was tempting to think of adopting again, believe me, it was. Although Oronzo and I are happy with the two beautiful children we are raising right now, there's always more room in my heart for one more, especially for a biological half-sibling of Snuggle Bug's.
But after Oronzo and I talked about it, he made it very clear that all we went through to adopt the two children we now have was more than enough for him. I asked him to sleep on it and discuss it again the next morning, and he did, but his feelings didn't change. He is done building our family.
I felt a bit sad but knew that it was important to respect his feelings. I must be honest with myself and admit that I agree with him. I feel done with building our family as well for many reasons.
The kids are finally getting to the age where they're a bit more independent and we're enjoying this. There are financial considerations, since we want our children to attend college and we're saving for them. And lets face it, we're not getting any younger. We started out as "older" parents even with Snuggle Bug (we adopted him in our late-30's).
And so, I called Giselle's mother back and explained why adopting again is not right for our family. She said that she certainly understood and asked us if we knew of any other family that might be interested. As a matter of fact, we do!
I've made friends with the parents of a little boy in Snuggle Bug's class and during our budding friendship this mother has shared with me their struggles to adopt a second child.
So, to make a long story short, I've put this family in touch with Giselle and her mom. They've sent a photo scrapbook and the two families are at the "feeling each other out" stage.
I don't know if this adoption will happen or not, but if it does I think it'll be pretty neat to have some possible contact with Snuggle Bug's biological sibling living in the same city.
Time will tell.
Has anyone else been asked to adopt a second time by their child's birth parents?