Saturday, September 06, 2008
Baby Bug update
I didn't expect to have the opportunity to give an update on Baby Bug but I do have one to share.

It's been three weeks and one day since we returned Baby Bug to her parents, for good.  Three weeks and one day of not seeing her, basking in her beautiful smile, holding her, cuddling her, or watching her grow.  Can you tell that I miss her?

I've been dreaming of Baby Bug since that last day.  There was one night, not long ago, that I dreamed that she was crying.  I got up out of bed and started heading for her room to sooth her and possibly feed her.  It only took me a few steps to remember that she wasn't with us anymore and that I must've been dreaming.  My heart ached all over again and I had a tough time getting back to sleep while thinking of her.

Each day the pain is diminishing but I think of Baby Bug often and wonder how she's doing.   

A week after she left, I called her parents to check on her and her dad willingly gave me an update, saying she was doing well and was sleeping through the night most nights, except when her top teeth that are coming in were bothering her.  He mentioned that she may end up being one of those kids that goes straight to walking, rather than crawling first.  He told me that she's cruising and even trying to stand independently for a few seconds.

When I relayed the update to Oronzo, he cautioned me to give them their space and not call too often.  So, I didn't call again.  I figured I'd wait to hear more about Baby Bug at the next Child & Family Team meeting that I'll be attending via conference call on 16 September.  Side note: I've learned that foster parents are encouraged to continue attending such meetings, and even court hearings for up to 6 months after their former foster child has been reunited with their families.  The courts are still mailing us the schedule for the hearings.

Imagine my surprise when my cell phone rang and the number that showed on the caller ID showed Baby's Bug's parent's number!  I answered the phone with my heart pounding.

Baby Bug's mom called to tell me that Baby Bug had just started crawling and was now into everything.  Since we were involved in trying to help her learn how to crawl while she was still living with us, her mom thought we might want to know this news.  We chatted for a bit on other things that Baby Bug has been up to.  

I told Baby Bug's mom that I really appreciated her thinking to call me.  I admitted that I was wondering how Baby Bug was doing and that it was so good to hear how well she is.  Baby Bug's mom told me, "Anytime you're wondering how she's doing, please call us.  We don't mind."

After hanging up the phone with her, I realized that although it was wonderful getting the call, it also brought up the painful feelings again.  After caring and loving for her for 8 1/1 months, we didn't get to witness her beginning to crawl.  We probably won't be there to see her walk.  We don't get to be a part of her life as I had hoped.  Ouch!

Still,  I was touched that Baby Bug's mom took the time to call me and share an update with me.  It gives me hope that maybe, just maybe we'll get that invite to Baby Bug's 1st birthday party after all.  Time will tell.

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8:50 PM
14 comments


14 Comments:
At 10:19 PM, Anonymous The Wooden Porch said...

As someone reading all this, I can see the hand of God in Baby Bug's life. I know your heart is breaking. You have done such a faithful job with that baby. If you didn't love her as much as you did, she wouldn't be so well off.

She is adorable by the way!

 
At 12:21 AM, Blogger forgetfulone said...

I hope so, too! What a darling she is.

 
At 4:49 AM, Blogger Jen said...

i'm glad you got that call.....keep your faith.

 
At 5:27 AM, Blogger Heidi @ GGIP said...

Very bittersweet. Happy that she is doing well at her parents' home, but unhappy that you can't witness these things.

 
At 5:52 AM, Blogger Carey said...

I Hope you get that invite as well. Im glad you received good news. I pray it helps calms your heart.

 
At 7:44 AM, Blogger Michelle said...

It sure does sound promising that they'll be inviting you to her bday party...it sounds like they really did just want some time to adjust to being a family again, otherwise if they weren't going to have any contact w/you at all she wouldn't have ever called just to let you know Baby Bug started crawling. I think that's such a positive thing to get that phone call from her!

 
At 1:26 PM, Blogger Mary said...

I can only imagine how hard it is to love a baby and give her back. What a blessed gift you have given to Baby Bug. I'm also pulling for you with the first birthday invitation!

 
At 6:59 AM, Blogger Cheri said...

I'm am praying incredibly hard for your whole family right now. I can't imagine the depth of your emotions and am waiting to see what God has planned through all of this!

 
At 11:31 AM, Blogger Nicole said...

I am so happy to read this post!!! That is wonderful news that Baby Bug's mom said that...she obviously realizes that you were (and are!) such a huge part of BB's life...and of course you wonder what she's doing. For so long, you were involved in everything she was doing! Great great news...

 
At 9:49 AM, Anonymous Revka of RS Designs said...

Aw, she is so cute! I read previous posts to find out what happened. I am saddened by the situation and am very happy that her birth mother did contact you on her own.

Here's praying you do get that invitation! :)

 
At 12:54 PM, OpenID pinkexplosion said...

She is so precious!

God is amazing isn't he? We continue to pray for peace for everyone involved.

 
At 8:39 PM, Blogger Debbie B said...

I'm so glad that she called you. What a wonderful treat. Our daughter was with in an interim foster home for 2 weeks while her birthmom made a decision to place with us and I love giving them updates often.
I know you had Baby Bug in your care and hoped to adopt her and I can only imagine how that feels. I've been praying for your heart to begin healing, while of course always remembering the little girl that touched your lives.
Hoping you continue to hear good things from the family.

 
At 12:32 AM, Blogger julie said...

I'm praying you get that invite. Hang in there.

((Hugs))
Julie

 
At 12:10 PM, Anonymous Poppy and Peony said...

I just found your blog again (I stopped blogging for 1/2 a year then just started a new blog). I remember this feeling (mixed bag of emotions well) having fostered myself. Bittersweet is the word that comes to mind. I hope you have continued contact!

aspecialfamily

 

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Name: Overwhelmed

My complete profile

It wasn't supposed to work this way...Parts 1 through 10

(the story of the private, domestic adoption of our son)


(Part 1)
(Part 2)
(Part 3)
(Part 4)
(Part 5)
(Part 6)
(Part 7)
(Part 8)
(Part 9)
(Part 10- Adoption Finalization)

Fostering isn't for the faint of heart!

(our journey to adopt again through foster-to-adopt, the good, the bad, & everything in between)


Adoption #2- considering the State
More Adoption #2 thoughts
Adoption #2- Back to considering the State
Adoption #2- The Paperwork (Round 1)
Adoption #2- The Paperwork (Round 2)
Family Foster Home Licensing Prep Checklist
Adoption #2- Long overdue update
PS-MAPP class homework assignment
Our preliminary home inspection went well!
Adoption #2: Licensing update
Adoption #2- Foster Facts
Adoption #2: I love it when things go my way!
Adoption #2- The home inspection
Adoption #2- We failed our home inspection!
Adoption #2- We passed the follow-up home inspection!
Adoption #2- Still waiting
Adoption #2- We're getting closer
Adoption #2- An update & a lead
Adoption #2- The lead that didn't pan out.
Adoption #2- We're licensed!
Adoption #2- We have a tiny baby here!
Adoption #2- Update on this precious little girl.
Adoption #2- Quick update on Baby Bug
Adoption #2- Baby Bug is staying longer!
Adoption #2- Baby Bug is growing!
Adoption #2- Overdue update on Baby Bug
Adoption #2- The latest on Baby Bug
Adoption #2- Shopping spree for Baby Bug
Being a Foster Parent Does Not Make Me A Saint
Adoption #2- Another Placement Call!
Adoption #2- Placement Meeting- UPDATED!
Adoption #2- We have Boo at our home!
Adoption #2- Meeting Boo
Adoption #2- I'm angry on Boo's behalf!
Adoption #2- A Birthday Party for Boo
Adjusting to three 3 and under!
Stressful moments in fostering.
Adoption #2- Update on our foster daughters
CPS Workers Jerking Our Chain!
It's getting much worse!
Fostering: Update on Baby Bug
Fostering: Update on Boo
The effects of fostering on Snuggle Bug
The time is drawing near to let go of Baby Bug.
Good conversation with Baby Bug's dad.
Boo has a Permanency hearing coming soon!
My heart is breaking!
Bittersweet news about Baby Bug.
Next Friday is going to be tough.
Packing up Baby Bug's belongings
It's done- Baby Bug is gone.
Working on finding peace, one day at a time.
Referral to the Early Intervention Program
Baby Bug update
Home Inspection for re-licensing
Parole granted for Boo's bio mom
Baby Bug is turning 1 year old soon.
Day 2 of Boo's permanency hearing
A prayer answered today!
Attending Baby Bug's 1st birthday party
Foster news
Good news for Boo's case
Boo's bio family visits
Termination Trial date set!
A new caseworker for Boo
I've been asked to testify in court.
Court hearing for "John Doe"
Contested termination trial begins tomorrow afternoon
Boo's adoption has been finalized!

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Working on finding peace, one day at a time.
It's done- Baby Bug is gone.
























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