This adoption video brought tears to my eyes, reminding me of our first magical moments with Snuggle Bug, meeting and holding him at 2 minutes old.

I wish I would've recorded those first few moments with Snuggle Bug, but we were so terrified of it all falling apart and trying so hard to be respectful of the decision that had to be re-made.  So we had no extended family present the day of his birth and no video recording.  We have pictures and our sweet memories.

Has it really been 10 years since the birth of our amazing son?  What a blessing he has been in our lives!

Labels: adoption, adoption #1, babies, God, miracle, Snuggle Bug

Hubby and I had a much-needed date night last night and it was perfect!

It's rare he and I get out alone, because we don't have family living anywhere close and these days it costs $10/hour for a sitter. By the time you have dinner and a movie, you've spent $40 just on the hired help! It's rather cost-prohibitive.

A family from school invited both our kiddos over for a sleep-over with their children (same ages, same genders).  The fact that this fellow mom was willing to deal with 4 children all night and most of this morning with the sole intent of giving us a date night makes me feel as though I need to stop at a florist on the way to picking up the kids and bring her flowers to say, "Thanks!"  That is no small feat.

Once we dropped the kids off, Hubby and I met some of his former co-workers at a small red-neck bar on the water, where we had a drink outdoors and said our goodbyes to a young man who was moving out-of-state for another job.  We laughed a lot.  Those co-workers are witty, sarcastic and oh-so-fun.

Next stop was the theater to see Interstellar.  It's the movie about a group of space explorers who use a newly discovered wormhole to travel beyond our solar system in search of a planet that can sustain life, as humanity faces extinction on earth.  Overall, it was an interesting and entertaining movie.

Our last stop before heading home was dinner at a quaint late-night eatery with good comfort food and a gregarious owner who was so interesting we invited her to pull up a chair and chat with us during our meal.

This morning, we awoke to silence.  No child opening our bedroom door at 6:30 a.m. to see when we were getting up. No need to fix anyone breakfast. No pleading for t.v., playdates or leftover Halloween candy.  No homework struggles.  Just blissful silence. I laid in bed for a while and just soaked up the quiet, letting my own thoughts dance around my head for a while before getting up.

I don't have to get the kids for another 4 hours.  I think I'll ignore the homework and work-related writing that's calling my name and indulge instead in a bubble bath and a good book.

When's the last time you had a date night?

Labels: babysitters, date night, Interstellar, kids, movies

We have a framed poster with these rules in a central part of our house, as reminder of a few of the things we strive for together as a family.

As Snuggle Bug and Boo grow older, we're discovering these rules aren't as easy to follow as they used to be.

#2 is challenging for Snuggle Bug as of late.  At nine years old,  his little sister is considered less of a friend and playmate and more of a nuisance or a pest, particularly when he has his friends around. He has a tendency to speak his frustrations with her aloud, at times using rather harsh tones and words.

#4 and #5 seem to be a tough ones for Boo these days.  Who knew a 7-year-old could act so sassy and disrespectful one minute and sweet-as-pie the next.


A common phrase I use with my children is, "Our family doesn't..." or "Our family believes..." to remind them our family values are more important than following what friends or others consider to be permissible.

As our children age, it's becoming  more clear we are no longer the center of their universe and are no longer their sole source of influence.

On one hand, not being the center of their universe is a positive.  It means they're gaining a sense of independence.  They're forming their own opinions and interests.  These developmental changes are exciting to watch unfold and the resulting conversations can be amazing.

On the other hand, realizing friends and acquaintances are gaining an increasing amount of influence over them is scary.  It feels as though we're more frequently in defensive mode, attempting to solidify and justify the foundation of our core family values with our children, as they are exposed to more varying shades of "acceptable behavior" amongst their peers.

So, Ornozo and I muddle our way through these parenting challenges that change with each passing year. Some days we're on the same page, other days we're not.  We realize the importance of presenting a united front to our children, but at times it seems to be easier said than done.

If only parenting came with a clearly outlined instruction manual.

School is in full swing now and Snuggle Bug and Boo are doing great!

Both of our kids attend a Montessori school and I love how this school places a large emphasis on kindness and respect to others, involvement in our community and using good manners.  I feel as though the school reinforces what we try to teach at home.

Boo loves, loves, loves Kindergarten!  Each day she when I pick her up from school she chatters excitedly about what she's done and who she's played with.  It's never a chore to get her to go to school.  She actually asks on the weekends when she gets to go back.

Snuggle Bug is adjusting to 2nd grade.  He likes his teachers and they're easing him into the school work and homework so it's not too difficult yet.  I'm trying not to pass on my procrastinating tendencies to my children, so I've established a routine of sitting down each day to do a little bit of homework.  He did make the comment, "There are a lot more rules in 2nd grade!"  I had to laugh at that comment.

Both Snuggle Bug and Boo are part of the swim team so we're at swim team practice 3 to 4 times per week.  That makes for a busy week.  We look forward to the weekends!

Despite the daily hustle and bustle, I find myself thankful that my children are still young and under our roof where I know they're safe and I get to tuck them in to bed each night!

I am truly blessed!

Labels: adoption, Boo, elementary school, family, Snuggle Bug

The kids and I are flying back home to where my side of the family lives (in the Midwest) and we couldn't be more excited! Oronzo has to stay here and work, but he doesn't mind. I think my large, boisterous family is somewhat overwhelming to him at times.

Labels: extended family, family, vacation

Oronzo and I made the decision some time ago that our family is complete with the two wonderful children we are parenting. Snuggle Bug is now 7 years old. Boo is now 5. They're finally becoming more independent and self reliant and we're enjoying this stage of parenting.

Labels: adoption, friends

I've decided I miss this blog. I miss the bloggers I used to be in frequent contact with. Perhaps I should carve out a bit of time each week for blogging and whip this blog back in to shape. What do you think?

Labels: adoption #1, family, friends

I received an unexpected phone call not long ago, from Giselle's mother.

Labels: adoption, family, Snuggle Bug

One year ago today was a very happy day, indeed.

Labels: adoption, adoption #2, Boo, family

It's been over 7 months since I last posted here but this blog is like a comforting, old friend that I'll keep coming back to from time to time,

Labels: adoption, Boo, family, Oronzo, Snuggle Bug

The day we've been waiting for for approximately 2 1/2 years, give or take a month or two, finally arrived!

We recently finalized the adoption of Boo and she is now legally our daughter! Of course, we've considered her a part of our family pretty much from day one but now it's legal. There is no longer any threat of her being taken away from us.

As you all know, this has proven to be a much more difficult journey towards adoption than we expected. We entered into Foster Care training rather naively. We were quite optimistic in the outcome of adoption through the Foster Care system, believing that we'd have a child adopted within a year.

We also believed that we'd be adopting a child from unfit parents that had had their parental rights forcefully terminated by the State. In some ways, perhaps it helped us feel less guilty about wanting to adopt again, because we believed we'd be adopting a child truly in need of a loving home...a child right within our city.

Baby Bug was our first placement and we lost our hearts to her quickly. She was reunited with her parents 8 1/2 months later and, although we supported that decision because we knew how hard they worked to get her back, we grieved A LOT. I still miss her and I had to grieve all over again when her parents chose to end all contact with us a second time.

Our continued journey through the Foster Care system with Boo was very little like we expected. We were lied to by the initial social worker, who told us what she thought we wanted to hear, in order to get Boo placed in our home. It wasn't until I attended the next court hearing, a couple of months after her placement, that I realized how much the social worker had lied and kept information to us.

We tried desperately not to get our hopes up about adopting Boo, as we waited to see how things would pan out with her bio mom who was incarcerated. We waited, and waited, and waited for the judge to make a decision, either way.

We did our best to be "good" foster parents, attending all court hearings, filling out all necessary forms, speaking up inside and outside of the court and advocating for Boo's needs along the way, being careful to follow all guidelines put forth by the foster care agency we were licensed through.

After many months, we got the severance ruling that we had prayed for, due to the instability of Boo's bio mom and her criminal lifestyle. But then, against all odds, the Court of Appeals overturned that ruling on a technicality and threw the case back to the Juvenile Court system and told the new judge to "start over". That's when talks began in earnest of having Boo transferred out of state. It seemed that our state wanted to "wash their hands" of the situation, regardless of what that meant to Boo.

We had to hire our own lawyer to gain "party status" in the case and fight even harder for Boo's rights.

In the end, Boo's bio mom made the difficult decision to admit that she was incapable of offering Boo the stability she needed and deserved and voluntarily severe her parental rights so that we could adopt her. Everyone involved in the case felt that we would've gotten another severance ruling again, even had she not come to this conclusion on her own, but we didn't trust "the system".

The events leading up to Boo's adoption have been nightmarish. We lost a lot of sleep, our marriage was strained, our finances were strained with unexpected legal fees, our family struggled, we doubted ourselves. But, we hung in there, we fought for this precious little girl, and now she's forever an important part of our family!

Boo's Adoption Day was glorious! We had a private adoption ceremony, with the same judge that finalized Snuggle Bug's adoption and the same lawyer too! Many of our family members and very dear friends were there to witness this amazing event. There was much joy and celebration! And there was an unexpected bonus to all of this...Snuggle Bug was a part of it all and Boo's adoption finalization helped him to understand a bit more about his own that took place when he was only 3 months old.

Afterwards, we had a party in a nearby splash park for Boo. It's one of her favorite places to be and she had a grand time! She got an Adoption cake, many thoughtful gifts, lots of hugs and kisses, and many well-wishes.

It was an emotional day for me. It was perfect! There are moments when I still find it hard to believe that we actually made it through to the other side.

Shortly after Boo's finalization, we notified our foster care agency that we were closing our home. Ornozo and I thought long and hard about that decision. It wasn't an easy one to make. But we both feel that it's best to focus on the raising of the two beautiful children that we have been blessed with.

Maybe one day again we'll foster. I'm sure we'll find other ways to help children in need. It's a passion of mine.

Thank you for all that have followed this journey. Your support, encouragement, and prayers have meant the world to Oronzo and I!

Don't think that you've seen the last of me though. I may not blog as often as I used to, but I'll still pop in now and then to discuss issues related to being an adoptive parent. And I hope to hear from you as well!

I'm a bit uncomfortable posting our family picture on here, but if you've been following our journey and you'd like to see one of Boo's adoption day photos, leave me a comment with your email and I'll oblige!

Take care!

Labels: adoption, adoption #2, Boo, foster children, foster-to-adopt, fostering, Oronzo

As Boo's adoption finalization date approaches (a bit over a month away now), there's a whole lot of adoption talk going on in our household.

Labels: adoption, adoption #1, adoption #2, Boo, family, foster-to-adopt, fostering, Snuggle Bug

Sorry it's been so long since I've posted.

Labels: adoption #2, adoption paperwork, Boo, foster-to-adopt