It's been over 7 months since I last posted here but this blog is like a comforting, old friend that I'll keep coming back to from time to time,

Labels: adoption, Boo, family, Oronzo, Snuggle Bug

The day we've been waiting for for approximately 2 1/2 years, give or take a month or two, finally arrived!

We recently finalized the adoption of Boo and she is now legally our daughter! Of course, we've considered her a part of our family pretty much from day one but now it's legal. There is no longer any threat of her being taken away from us.

As you all know, this has proven to be a much more difficult journey towards adoption than we expected. We entered into Foster Care training rather naively. We were quite optimistic in the outcome of adoption through the Foster Care system, believing that we'd have a child adopted within a year.

We also believed that we'd be adopting a child from unfit parents that had had their parental rights forcefully terminated by the State. In some ways, perhaps it helped us feel less guilty about wanting to adopt again, because we believed we'd be adopting a child truly in need of a loving home...a child right within our city.

Baby Bug was our first placement and we lost our hearts to her quickly. She was reunited with her parents 8 1/2 months later and, although we supported that decision because we knew how hard they worked to get her back, we grieved A LOT. I still miss her and I had to grieve all over again when her parents chose to end all contact with us a second time.

Our continued journey through the Foster Care system with Boo was very little like we expected. We were lied to by the initial social worker, who told us what she thought we wanted to hear, in order to get Boo placed in our home. It wasn't until I attended the next court hearing, a couple of months after her placement, that I realized how much the social worker had lied and kept information to us.

We tried desperately not to get our hopes up about adopting Boo, as we waited to see how things would pan out with her bio mom who was incarcerated. We waited, and waited, and waited for the judge to make a decision, either way.

We did our best to be "good" foster parents, attending all court hearings, filling out all necessary forms, speaking up inside and outside of the court and advocating for Boo's needs along the way, being careful to follow all guidelines put forth by the foster care agency we were licensed through.

After many months, we got the severance ruling that we had prayed for, due to the instability of Boo's bio mom and her criminal lifestyle. But then, against all odds, the Court of Appeals overturned that ruling on a technicality and threw the case back to the Juvenile Court system and told the new judge to "start over". That's when talks began in earnest of having Boo transferred out of state. It seemed that our state wanted to "wash their hands" of the situation, regardless of what that meant to Boo.

We had to hire our own lawyer to gain "party status" in the case and fight even harder for Boo's rights.

In the end, Boo's bio mom made the difficult decision to admit that she was incapable of offering Boo the stability she needed and deserved and voluntarily severe her parental rights so that we could adopt her. Everyone involved in the case felt that we would've gotten another severance ruling again, even had she not come to this conclusion on her own, but we didn't trust "the system".

The events leading up to Boo's adoption have been nightmarish. We lost a lot of sleep, our marriage was strained, our finances were strained with unexpected legal fees, our family struggled, we doubted ourselves. But, we hung in there, we fought for this precious little girl, and now she's forever an important part of our family!

Boo's Adoption Day was glorious! We had a private adoption ceremony, with the same judge that finalized Snuggle Bug's adoption and the same lawyer too! Many of our family members and very dear friends were there to witness this amazing event. There was much joy and celebration! And there was an unexpected bonus to all of this...Snuggle Bug was a part of it all and Boo's adoption finalization helped him to understand a bit more about his own that took place when he was only 3 months old.

Afterwards, we had a party in a nearby splash park for Boo. It's one of her favorite places to be and she had a grand time! She got an Adoption cake, many thoughtful gifts, lots of hugs and kisses, and many well-wishes.

It was an emotional day for me. It was perfect! There are moments when I still find it hard to believe that we actually made it through to the other side.

Shortly after Boo's finalization, we notified our foster care agency that we were closing our home. Ornozo and I thought long and hard about that decision. It wasn't an easy one to make. But we both feel that it's best to focus on the raising of the two beautiful children that we have been blessed with.

Maybe one day again we'll foster. I'm sure we'll find other ways to help children in need. It's a passion of mine.

Thank you for all that have followed this journey. Your support, encouragement, and prayers have meant the world to Oronzo and I!

Don't think that you've seen the last of me though. I may not blog as often as I used to, but I'll still pop in now and then to discuss issues related to being an adoptive parent. And I hope to hear from you as well!

I'm a bit uncomfortable posting our family picture on here, but if you've been following our journey and you'd like to see one of Boo's adoption day photos, leave me a comment with your email and I'll oblige!

Take care!

Labels: adoption, adoption #2, Boo, foster children, foster-to-adopt, fostering, Oronzo

These past 3 days I've had the opportunity to experience what life might be like as a Stay-At-Home mom. Our nanny is on vacation, so I took some days off of work to cover.

Labels: Boo, family, family time, Oronzo, Snuggle Bug

So, in this post I complained that Baby Bug's CPS worker was trying to pressure us into agreeing to covering return transportation for Baby Bug's visits/appointments with her parents, which by the way are currently at 3 times per week. Unfortunately things are only getting worse!

Labels: adoption #2, Baby Bug, foster children, fostering, Oronzo

Ugh! We are so frustrated right now. The CPS worker and CPS Aide assigned to Baby Bug's case are ticking us off!

Since the day Baby Bug's parents received supervised visits 4 months ago, we've had transportation problems!

Although not required in our state, we offered to be responsible for transporting Baby Bug to her visits (45 minute drive each way) in the mornings, as long as CPS would transport her back from her visits. We didn't want to be the type of foster parents that refused to be helpful.

From the beginning, Oronzo would arrive with Baby Bug on time for the supervised visits but the CPS aide assigned to supervise the visits would inevitably show up late, so Oronzo would have to sit around with the kids in the car and wait for her arrival so that he could pass Baby Bug off to her. And even though we'd be given a time that she would be returned back to us, again the CPS aide would show up much later than expected.

The latest is that CPS is trying to pressure us into being responsible for picking Baby Bug up at the end of her visits so that they don't have to. We've told them from day one that this will not work for us, as the return time is always either during nap time for the other two kids or during dinner time and my work schedule changes from week to week so I can't commit to being available either.

As if that weren't bad enough, Oronzo tells me that the visitation times change on a weekly basis. He's looked back at his calendar over the past 4 months and there's not been two straight weeks of the same visitiation schedule. CPS keeps changing it and usually with very short notice! Baby Bug's visits with her parents are increasing in length and frequency as they prepare to eventually transfer her back home so this is a good thing and we want to help where we can but we've got two other children and our work schedules to factor in as well!

And then there are the required monthly visits where CPS comes to our home to check on Baby Bug. Baby Bug's CPS worker has changed the visit for today twice and then didn't show up at the appointed 8:30 AM time. She emailed (not a phone call, an email) Oronzo minutes before the scheduled time to say she couldn't make it and that she'd need to reschedule for today at 1:30 PM. Oronzo is really ticked off, since this isn't the first time she's pulled this on him, and is emailing her back to say she'll have to pick another day because 1:30 PM won't work for him!

I understand that CPS is understaffed and overworked but do they have to be so discourteous to foster parents in their efforts to juggle all of their responsibilities. Their inconsistencies and lack of common courtesy is frustrating!

At least we've had no problems with Boo's CPS worker thus far! I guess that's something.

Labels: adoption #2, Baby Bug, fostering, Oronzo

Last week I posted about how I was leaving on a business trip and stressing about the fact that our foster daughters were going to be placed in respite care.  I wanted to follow up and let you know how it's going.

Oronzo dropped the girls off on Monday afternoon.  He told me that initially Boo seemed un-phased by being at Barb and Jim's house (the respite care providers) again.  But when Oronzo started heading for the door without her, she started to cry.  Barb picked her up and held her on her lap to comfort her as Oronzo said his goodbyes.  Baby Bug didn't protest but she's only 4 1/2 months old so I wouldn't have expected her to.

I've called Barb every day, since leaving for Vegas on Monday, to check on the girls.  Barb told me Boo was anxious most of Monday but on Monday evening she seemed to loosen up a bit and started playing with the toys they had.  She slept through the night that night and has every night since.  Each day Boo has gotten more comfortable with Barb and Jim and now is to the point where she's actually having fun.

Baby Bug has had troubles with her morning naps at Barb and Jim's house, so she's been a bit fussy in the mornings but other than that she's doing fine too.  She started sleeping through the night for us last Wednesday and she's continuing to do this for Barb and Jim.

Barb tells me she's enjoying her time with the girls and she's been so suportive of my phone calls.  She doesn't seem to mind taking the time to chat with me each day and share what the girls are up to.

I'm flying home tomorrow but I won't get in until after the girls are in bed.  I'm tempted to go in, pull Boo out of bed, and to sit and rock with her when I get home.  I've miss holding her (and Baby Bug) in my arms!

In other related news, Oronzo got me a MacBook last month and I've been using it to do video iChats with him and Snuggle Bug while away on this trip.  This is the first time we've done this and Snuggle Bug was a bit confused.  He kept looking at the computer monitor and then our front door, asking, "Mommy home?"  I explained that I was still at work in Las Vegas.  He told Oronzo, "Mommy in puter (computer)!"  For me, it was so wonderful to see his sweet little face and to be able to hear his voice.  I showed him a gift that I got him (a little stuffed, white puppy to add to his puppy collection) and he was excited to see that!

I really love my new MacBook!  It's got a built in webcam and microphone and I'm amazed at all the neat features that this laptop has (iPhoto, iTunes, iCalendar, neat email templates, etc) and I love how integrated all the software applications are.  Having been a Windows PC user all my life, I do feel a bit drunk trying to maneuver around this Mac but I'm learning fairly quickly and I'm loving it!  And any laptop that allows me to easily see my little boy while I'm away from home gets an A+ in my book!

I can't wait to get home tomorrow!

Labels: adoption #2, Baby Bug, Boo, foster children, fostering, Oronzo, product review, Snuggle Bug

Fair warning, this is going to be a long post.

Thing have been stressful these past couple of weeks in our household and it probably won’t get any better for another couple of weeks.

Last week I was away on business and during my time away Oronzo was left to take care of all three children on his own, 24/7. Let’s just say that things did not go well. Baby Bug is teething and she went from waking up only once per night for a feeding to waking up every couple of hours screaming in pain. Oronzo tried to sooth her quickly but there were a few times when her cries woke the other two children up. Oronzo got very little sleep the entire week.

Boo regressed back to feeling very anxious every time Oronzo would set her down and try to get something done. She would start sobbing and try to get him to hold her. Snuggle Bug was pretty self-sufficient but his needs still had to be met too. On top of the chaos with the children, Oronzo was desperately trying to get work done in the evenings for a project he’s trying to complete for a client. He failed miserably to meet that deadline and had to request an extension.

When I returned, Oronzo felt at the end of his rope. When I asked why he didn’t ask for help he explained that the help he needed the most was in the evenings and no one was available for that.

Unfortunately, I’m leaving on yet another week-long business trip this coming Monday. Usually my trips aren’t back to back like this but I can’t get out of going on this next trip. We thought that Oronzo’s mom would be able to come and stay with him for the week to help out with the kids but she informed us last weekend that she was no longer available, at all. We’re not even sure why but we feel like she’s left us hanging because she originally told us she would be able to help and now suddenly she can't.

Oronzo made it clear to me that he could not have a repeat of last week. He’s still behind on work and desperately needs to catch. As foster parents, we don’t have a lot of options when it comes to getting help in the caring of our foster children. To have someone watch the children for even an hour, they have to be fingerprinted and have a background check done. To watch them overnight, they have to be a fully licensed foster family. What this means is that Oronzo is going to have to put Baby Bug and Boo in respite care next week.

When he told me this, I panicked. Boo has enough separation anxiety issues as it is. Sending her to a strange home for a week surly will only make it worse. I’m sure she’s going to think we’ve left her for good! Baby Bug is a happy little baby and probably will be fine, as long as the foster family that’s caring for her gives her lots of love and attention. I confess that I pleaded with Ornozo not to do this and even went so far as to try to make him feel guilty about even thinking of it. I wasn’t very supportive of his admission that he was feeling overwhelmed with taking care of all three children by himself the entire time I was gone. My lack of support has led to strained feelings between him and I.

It took me a couple of days to accept that respite care is the only option for this next trip. I called our agency worker and filled her in on the situation. I started crying as I spoke with her. She was quick to reassure me that it was OKAY to ask for help and said that she understood that the restrictions placed on us on who can watch the foster children makes respite care unavoidable in these situations. She assured me she’d find a good family to take the girls. I requested that she try to find foster parents with no other children that would take both girls and that could give them their undivided attention.

Our agency worker appears to have come through for us. She found a couple that is just doing respite only and will have no other children in the home next week but our two girls. I called and spoke to the foster mom and we talked for about 30 minutes. I shared with her my concerns and she assured me that she’d take good care of them for us. She offered to let me come to her house ahead of time to get a tour and to get to know her and her husband a little better so I’m taking the girls tomorrow morning to meet with her. She’s okay with me giving her notes on the girls’ needs and sending a list of the items we’ll be leaving with them.

I’m still quite apprehensive about sending the girls to respite care and I think Boo will struggle with this even after she’s back home with us next Friday afternoon, but I’m trying to be respectful of Oronzo’s need for assistance. I’ve apologized to him for not being more supportive in the first place and the tensions are easing a bit. Now I just want next week to be over so I can get back to taking care of my family!

Who knew that business travel would prove to be so painful! You're prayers for our family next week would be much appreciated!

Labels: business travel, foster children, fostering, Oronzo, parenting, stay-at-home daddy, working mommy

Yesterday afternoon I got to meet Boo for the first time, at the airport as Oronzo was picking us up.

I watched as Oronzo walked up to us, holding a little girl with a full head of silky brown hair. Her face was somber and inquisitive.

Snuggle Bug looked up and said, "Daddy has another baby!" I had to laugh at that! He didn't seem to phased at this additional baby, he was just stating the obvious.

Before I barely got the words, "Hi!" out of my mouth, Oronzo handed Boo over to me so that he could sweep Snuggle Bug up for a big bear hug. Boo didn't fuss at being passed over to me, she just looked me over intently and I did the same to her.

Boo is a beautiful little girl. She has shoulder length hair that is thick, soft, and wavy. Her bangs are a bit long over her dark brown eyes. Her skin is creamy and fair. She has a pretty bow shaped mouth and a delicate nose. It's obvious that she's been well taken care of because she's a solid 12-month old.

I got to spend the rest of the day yesterday getting to know Boo. She's certainly quiet and clingy but I don't blame her. She was removed from the only family she's known for the last 7 months. I'm surprised she wasn't more agitated. She doesn't like to be set down on the floor, it makes her cry, but if we set her on our bed or on the couch, she's okay with that. She just wants to keep one of us within eye-sight.

Despite her shyness, we had a few happy moments with Boo yesterday. She smiled and laughed out loud as she watched Oronzo and Snuggle Bug tickling each other and giggling together. She pretty much laughed each time she heard Snuggle Bug laugh. She also chattered away to Baby Bug when we had the three kids strapped in their car seats in the back seat. Oronzo said that's the most he's heard her laugh or chatter since she arrived at our house. Apparently having other little ones around her is good for her.

Boo is a good little eater. She doesn't appear to be picky about what she eats and Oronzo says she can eat more than Snuggle Bug at times! She ate quite a bit at dinner last night.

Bath time last night was interesting. Juggling 3 kids' bath, storytime, cuddling, and bedtime was a bit of a challenge but between the two of us Oronzo and I got it done. At one point, while Oronzo was finishing Snuggle Bug's bath, I was holding Boo and Baby Bug at the same time in our leather rocker recliner. They both snuggled up to me and let me rock and sing to them. It was very sweet.

Boo went to bed last night with no objections. Oronzo said she's the easiest baby in that respect. If you put her in her crib with a blankie for a nap or bedtime, she'll not fuss a bit. She just goes to sleep. I don't think I've ever had a child that doesn't fuss at least a bit at having to go to bed, so I'm not sure what to think of that. I checked on her a few times throughout the night and she appeared to be doing fine.

I found out yesterday that there's a chance we may have to send Boo back to her most current foster family. We weren't supposed to get her this soon, she came earlier because the foster mom requested respite care for her. That respite care was only approved by CPS through Monday and Oronzo got a call from our agency social worker telling us that she'd have to go back to the foster family until her CPS case worker could get a transfer approved.

Oronzo told our agency worker that Boo is doing fairly well at our house and he thought it might be more confusing to go back her previous foster family, only to be sent back to us within a few days. Oronzo asked if she could just be transferred directly to us. Our agency worker said that wasn't up to her and since Monday was a government holiday, the CPS case worker wasn't in to discuss it with. Oronzo got off the phone with the our agency worker believing that he'd have to return Boo that day.

10 minutes later, Oronzo got a call from Boo's previous foster mom. She sounded quite distraught at hearing Boo would be coming back when she thought we'd get to keep her. She said she wasn't feeling well and didn't think she could handle taking her back. Oronzo told her it was out of his hands and suggested that she call our agency worker to discuss it with her, since Boo's CPS worker wasn't available. Apparently she did just that because our agency worker called back and told Oronzo she was going to extend the respite care through Wednesday in the hopes that she could get a hold of Boo's CPS worker before then.

Apparently Boo's CPS worker is okay with her staying with us, but she has to get Boo's lawyer to approve of this immediate transition and she's not 100% convinced that the lawyer will buy off on it. So, there's still a chance that Boo will be sent back to her previous foster family, despite the fact that the foster mom seems to be under a lot of emotional stress right now (at least that's what Oronzo can tell from the few conversations he's had with her) and would rather not get her back.

I hope Boo isn't sent back, she's been traumatized enough without being bounced back and forth even further. She's had 4 moves in her 12 months of life. I just want her to be able to settle in to our family so that we can love her and help her to trust those around her. She's very timid and scared right now.

Today Oronzo will have three small kids to care for while I'm at work (a 3 year old, a 12 month old, and a 3 1/2 month old). This is the most he's ever had at one time and he's wondering how it'll go. It won't be easy, but I'm confident he'll handle it with patience and love as he always does. He's so wonderful with children!

Wish us luck today as we wait to hear back from Boo's lawyer as to whether or not her case can be immediately transferred to us so she can stay.

Labels: adoption #2, Baby Bug, Boo, expanding our family, family, foster children, foster-to-adopt, fostering, Oronzo, Snuggle Bug, stay-at-home daddy

So, if you're wondering where I've been for the past 3 days, Oronzo, Snuggle Bug, and I escaped to Mexico for a mini-vacation Friday afternoon and just returned last night. Last week at work was extremely busy (long hours) so we decided to treat ourselves to a long weekend by the ocean. As always, we had a blast! I thought I'd share some pictures from our trip. Click on the images to enlarge. Enjoy!


This was our first glimpse of the beach after we unpacked our belongings in the condo and went down for a walk. Pretty, eh?


Here's Snuggle Bug with his new-found friend, Max. They were admiring a sand castle that two guys had built earlier that morning.


Here's Snuggle Bug playing with another new-found friend, Aspen. They decided to try to make their own sand castle.


This was our view from the balcony of our rented condo. The picture doesn't capture the sparkling ocean water as the sun shone down upon the waves. It was beautiful! We had breakfast and lunch on the balcony each day.


Snuggle Bug had his first sailboat ride this past weekend. He loved it! He got to help his daddy steer the boat for a while. We were thankful that he showed no signs of sea-sickness!


Here's Snuggle Bug in the cabin of the sailboat. Don't you just love the pink sunglasses that he wanted to wear? :)


The rocking of the sailboat upon the ocean waves lulled Snuggle Bug to sleep. He napped through our return to shore. We hit a wall of fog on our return but with Oronzo's GPS we had no problems finding our way back.

Well, hope you've enjoy the pictures. Have a great Tuesday!

Check back tomorrow for an adoption update.

Labels: family, Oronzo, Snuggle Bug, vacation

A dear blogger friend of mine, Kathleen Marie at The Open Window, has come up with a neat "Welcome to My Neighborhood", where she's inviting us all to share our favorite things about our neighborhood (perhaps our favorite local hangout or attraction) using photos, stories, and/or slide shows.

I'm in Las Vegas on business right now and I didn't plan ahead by taking pictures of my neighborhood before I left, so you'll have to let me paint you a picture with words. I do have pictures of Snuggle Bug that I can use to help support my story.

Oronzo and I purchased our 4 BR, brick home approximately 2 years ago. It's in a quite, well-kept little neighborhood.

This is the first home that I've ever owned. I've spent most of my adult life moving from city to city for work and, as a result, renting.

Buying this home has allowed me to finally but down roots. It's allowed Oronzo and I to create a safe and loving haven for the raising of our children.

Our home is filled with laughter, love, and the smells of baked goodies! We open our home to friends and family often.

Being from a small town, I craved to know my neighbors so over these past 2 years I've worked hard to find opportunities to interact with those that live around us.

When we moved in and got settled, Oronzo, Snuggle Bug, and I walked from house to house to knock on doors and introduce ourselves to everyone on our street. I even went so far as to make a neighborhood chart and pass it out to all the neighbors so that we could all know each other.

On Valentine's Day Snuggle Bug and I went up and down our street and delivered cookies that we had baked the night before.

We've gotten to know many of our neighbors quite well. Our morning walks result in invitations to come in to neighbors houses for a visit. When out taking care of their yards, our neighbors will stop for chats. When we go out of town, we have neighbors that are happy to look after our house for us.

And at Halloween, Snuggle Bug rakes in the loot because our neighbors know him and they like to give him handfuls of candy at each stop!

Not far outside of our neighborhood is our church. After joining, we learned that Oronzo's parents were members of our church when they were newly married. We love our church! Although large, it's warm, inviting, and very beautiful. The parishioners are friendly and the priests are fantastic! Snuggle Bug was baptized in our church and, as long as we stay put, will celebrate his First Communion and Confirmation here too. When he's a bit older, I intend for Snuggle Bug and I to join the family choir! I love being a part of a spriritual family such as this one.

A few blocks from our church is our favorite local French cafe. We eat breakfast there every Sunday and we've gotten to know the owner and wait staff quite well. The food is delicious, the cafe is bright and cheerful, the walls are covered with the artwork of local artist. It's a bustling cafe and Snuggle Bug loves how he's given crayons and paper immediately upon being seated. We love this place!

We love supporting local owners whenever we can!

We have several parks near our neighborhood. Snuggle Bug's favorite park is the one that has ducks. We take him there frequently so that he can feed the ducks a loaf of bread. One piece of bread for the ducks, one for Snuggle Bug. That's how it works.

The parks in our area host many activities. Each Spring and Fall we attend outdoor pops concerts where we pack a picnic dinner and a blanket and we go and enjoy music under the stars!

The parks also have frequent festivals, games, and many other family-fun activities. Since we live a few blocks from several close friends, we schedule park play-dates quite frequently.

We're fortunate to have several bookstores within our neighborhood. One is just 2 blocks away. It's a little hole-in-the-wall used bookstore that has row upon row of floor-to-ceiling bookshelves crammed full with books. Poking around this maze of books is one of my favorite past times! I love the smell of all those books!

We also have a Barnes & Noble bookstore close by and Snuggle Bug enjoys their Kids Corner where they hold toddler story times several times throughout the week.

He also enjoys the Thomas the Tank train table that is in the children's area. Even though he has his own train set at home, he still makes a bee-line to the Barnes & Noble train set each time we visit.

Not only do we have a lot of bookstores in our neighborhood, but we also have a great library branch very close by and several others within driving distance. Our local library is fabulous! We've been taking Snuggle Bug to library story-times since he was an infant. At the library closest to us, Snuggle Bug has gotten quite attached to some of the librarians, especially the story time coordinator, Chris. Whenever he sees Chris, he drops everything and rushes right to her to give her a hug!

A while back, the main library in town organized a Story Town event where story book characters came out to play and local authors read their books aloud while older children acted out the story in costume. Each child was given a free book upon entrance into Story Town. Snuggle Bug loved this!

Although we love supporting local owners when we can, I must admit that we frequent a nearby Starbucks. They're only a mile from our house so we like to walk to Starbucks so that I can induldge in a tall hot chocolate with whipped cream and Snuggle Bug can have a piece of his favorite cinnamon swirl coffee cake.

I'm afraid we've created a Starbucks addiction in our son. A couple of weekends back we were visiting Oronzo's parents and they took us to have a picnic up in the mountains near their home. Aleiza, Oronzoz's mom, asked Snuggle Bug, "Do you want to go for a walk with Grandma?" Snuggle Bug's response was, "Get stroller, go Starbucks?" After indulging in a hearty laugh, we gently explained to Snuggle Bug that there was no Starbucks on the mountain, or even in the town where Oronzo's parents live.

Just a few blocks from our house we have a locally owned butcher shop! It sells the best sausages, steak, and other meats. It also has delicious deli sandwiches on the softest sub rolls. My mouth is watering just thinking of these. Walking down to the butcher shop to get sausages and chat with the butchers while we eat our deli sandwiches is one of our favorite Saturday activities!

Well, there you have it, a glimpse in to our little neighborhood that we love so much! I hope you've enjoyed my tour.

Now, I'm off to check out the other participates' posts for Kathleen Marie's Welcome to My Neighborhood event! I hope you've decided to participate so I can get a peek of your neighborhood! :)

Labels: family, home, Oronzo, photos, Snuggle Bug

Oronzo's car (a 2002 Kia Rio) has been on it's last leg for a few months now, especially with his hour commute to work. We've put some money into it but the last mechanic to look at it warned Oronzo that the clutch could go at any time and the transmission was close too. We realized that it was time to look for another car because it wasn't worth it to dump more money into the Kia.

Oronzo did a lot of research before choosing the 2007 Jeep Compass 4x4. He wanted a small SUV type car that had more space, since our family will hopefully be growing in the near future, one that would get decent gas mileage, and one that would be versatile for in-town driving and for traveling. And, he wanted a 4x4 (I guess it's a Jeep thing).

Oronzo decided that leasing would be a good option for him, since he could write much of the expense of it through his business. I'm still not thrilled with the idea of making car payments for the next 3 years, only to give the car back at the end with nothing to show for it, but two of my siblings lease and they love it (more car for less car payments, they say) so I decided to let Oronzo have his way on this one.

After comparing many dealerships in our city and other nearby towns and cities, he got the best deal that he could locally. He signed the paperwork last night and left for work in his new car this morning with a big grin on his face.

So, do any of you lease or have you considered it?

Labels: car leasing, family, Oronzo

If you're looking for my Favorite Ingredients Friday post, click right here.

I'm flying home to my family and I couldn't be happier! I can't wait to hold Snuggle Bug in my arms once again and shower him with kisses and to get a hug from my husband!

Oronzo tells me that Snuggle Bug has had a rough time with my absence. He's asked after me each day and sobbed desperately when he's been dropped off at daycare.

When I get home, I'm going to pick Snuggle Bug up from daycare and we're spending the rest of the day together, just him and I, until Oronzo gets home from work! I'm looking forward to time with my precious son!

This trip to FL wasn't all that grand. Work proved to be filled with long hours and frustrating equipment failures. It rained nearly all the time. The 'alone' time that I was looking forward to proved to be filled with longing to be with my boys back at home. I've missed them.

It'll be good to be home once again!

Labels: business travel, family, Oronzo, Snuggle Bug

Yesterday I posted about our upcoming home inspection which Oronzo was having to deal with himself, since I'm here in Florida.

Well, after it was done Oronzo called to say we did not pass it! That's right, despite the fact we scoured our house from top to bottom, read and re-read the checklist and the other detailed literature of details about what we should expect from the inspection, and even having our agency licensing agent walk through last week and give us the thumbs up, we did not pass the inspection yesterday! I'm just a bit frustrated with the whole deal!

There were three pool-related things that the State rep told us we need to modify in order to pass inspection:

1) Get locks for the gates of our pool. We have self-latching, self-closing gates that have the latch 5 feet off the ground, where no small child can ever reach them, even standing on a chair. We ripped out the old ones and replaced them with sturdier, safer new ones when we moved into our house. But apparently that's not enough and we need to purchase locks for the gates.

2) Snuggle Bug's window must be secured so that it cannot be open more than 4" without the use of a tool (like a screwdriver or a drill). Snuggle Bug's window faces our back yard (the pool is in the back yard). His window is outside of the pool gate, so even if he were able to climb out without breaking a leg, he still couldn't land himself in the pool! In the literature that we were given, all it said is that a foster child may not have a bedroom with a window that had access to the pool area. Well, the room the foster child will be in faces the side of the house, not the backyard, so we thought we were fine. Apparently not.

3) The sliding patio door that we have in our bedroom leading out to the pool area must be closed off altogether. The fact that this door has a lock (with a key) at the very top of the door that stays locked at all times is not enough (contrary to what our licensing agent told us during her walk-through). We must seal off the door entirely! I'm not sure how we're going to accomplish that without removing the door and walling up that entrance, which I'm not willing to do!

I understand that the State is very serious about a child's safety and that a pool is considered a high-risk situation. I get that and that's great! What frustrates me (and Oronzo) is that no where in their booklet of detailed instructions or their checklists did they mention the specifics any of these requirements that we're now being told we have to adhere to. Instead, they'd rather a lady drive 2 hours to tell us these things in person!

And what about our agency licensing agent? Surely we're not the first family to have a pool. Why didn't she warn us of these things? She warned us of other things. How could she not know of these major things?

Oronzo thinks that he can manage to make the necessary modifications this weekend by purchasing and installing hardware at Home Depotm (thank goodness he's handy like that). Our licensing agent is scheduled to be at our house on Monday afternoon to do our final interview (together, as a couple). She told us before our inspection that if for some reason we didn't pass (but she assured us that she saw no reason why we shouldn't) that we'd be able to make the necessary modifications, she could inspect it on behalf of the state, and then confirm with the state that we were in compliance so that we could be approved. All I can say is that this better be the case and this better not hold things up an unreasonable amount of time or I'm going to be even more frustrated!

I have a call in to our licensing agent. The message I left her is that we didn't pass inspection and that we needed to talk.

Needless to say, our licensing agent and the State is going to get some feedback from me, letting them know that they need to be more forthcoming about their requirements for those of us that have a pool! It needs to be spelled out in black and white so that families don't have to try to guess at what they're looking for!

Ugh! Oh, and did I mention that one of our cats died a mere hour before the inspection (he died of old age, we suspected it was coming soon) and that after the inspection when Oronzo dropped Snuggle Bug off at daycare Snuggle Bug sobbed like crazy. Oronzo called me on his way to work to share all of this with me and said he'd had the worst morning ever! I feel terrible that I wasn't at home to help Oronzo deal with all of this.

Labels: adoption #2, expanding our family, foster-to-adopt, fostering, home inspection, Homestudy, Oronzo

I made it safely to Ft. Walton Beach, FL. Well, technically speaking I'm in Shalimar, at the Fairfield Inn.

I talked to Oronzo and Snuggle Bug on the phone last night before I went to bed. Oronzo told me that when I talked to Snuggle Bug he looked at the phone like he was trying to figure out how I got in there. Then he kept asking, "Go outside, see Mama?" I guess he thought I was outside and he could go play with me if Daddy would just let him go out.

I really love the suggestions I got on my last post on how to help Snuggle Bug understand the passage of time and when I have to travel on business to Las Vegas in September, I'm going to try one. This time, I asked Oronzo to mark off days on the calendar with Snuggle Bug to track the time until I return back home.

This morning I woke up at 6:45 a.m. and stretched in my king sized bed and marveled again at having my own bed with five pillows to sleep in. Oronzo has a tendency to toss and turn a lot so it was nice to get an uninterrupted night of sleep. I went down for breakfast and enjoyed eating breakfast with a couple of my pilots.

As soon as I'm done with this post I'm going to venture out and head to the ocean side boardwalk area between Ft. Walton Beach and Destin. From what I remember from the last time I was here on business there are a lot of neat shops there. I have to scope out some gift ideas for Snuggle Bug and Oronzo. I've promised them both that I'd bring them something back, since they couldn't go on this trip with me.

I've gotten some seafood restaurant suggestions from a local so I'll be enjoying a nice lunch at Anglers before heading in to work at 1 p.m. Thankfully I'll have plenty of R&R time while I'm here. I intend to enjoy it!

I'm bummed that there are no fellow bloggers in this area. I would've loved to arrange an in-person meeting. Oh well, maybe another trip!

Labels: business travel, family, Oronzo, Snuggle Bug

Snuggle Bug survived his first week of daycare and, by default, so did we. It started out to be a rough week. This daycare thing is not for the faint of heart and it's caused our hearts much pain and sorrow.

This first 3 days last week, Snuggle Bug cried every day that we've dropped him off. In fact, some mornings he cried when we put him in the car and would say, "No go sool" (which means, "No go to school"). He's also said, "Daddy no go work." and "Mommy, get back here." as I'm walking away and leaving him in the daycare center.

The mornings I tried to keep our parting brief were ugly. I had to peel him off of me, as he's crying and screaming, and hand him over to the teacher and then walk away with the sound of his hysterical sobbing ringing in my ears. Needless to say, I was crying as well as I got to my car and drove to work.

Wednesday I tried a different approach, against the advice of many others who have been there, done that. I brought Snuggle Bug in to his classroom and instead of handing him over and quickly exiting, I asked him to show me the building blocks that I'm told he likes. I carried him over to the blocks and sat down with him in my lap and played with him for 10 minutes or so before leaving. When I told him I had to go to work, his little lip quivered and his eyes filled with tears. The teacher came over and got him and he started crying, but it wasn't the full-on hystrical sobbing that it had been the other days. Thursday worked the same way. Friday, Oronzo dropped him off and went in and played with him a bit before heading to work and it helped again.

Every day last week I called to check on him and I was always told the same thing, "He's having a good day, really. He's playing with blocks and he went down the slide. He's not crying."

As much as we dislike having Snuggle Bug in daycare, it hasn't been all bad. He's making new little friends. There's one little boy in particular that he plays with a lot, or so I'm told.

The daycare seems to do a pretty good job of keeping the kids busy with various activities. Last week they made raindrops, worked on colors and shapes, talked about sea creatures and water, and did some painting.


The "classroom" itself is full of projects that the kids have completed, although I have to wonder how much of the work was actually done by the kids and how much was done by the teacher.

Snuggle Bug's favorite activity is the painting. Kindercare sent him home with one of his projects that he did on Friday and we're going to include it in a packet that we send to Oronzo's mom for her birthday.

So, the bottom line is that our first week with Snuggle Bug in daycare wasn't fun, but we survived and I'm hopeful that things will get better with time.

And now, I leave you with a Carrie Underwood song that I have on my iPod nano that has brought comfort to me throughout this whole daycare ordeal because I'm trying to turn all of this over to Jesus.

Oh, and stay tuned for some adoption related posts this week. I have much to share with you, if you're interested!

Labels: daycare, faith, Oronzo, Snuggle Bug

It's time to post yet another WFMW tip. This week, I've decided to go for a bit of humor. I need to lighten things up because it's proving to be a really rough week thus far.

So, do you want to know how to get your spouse to do the dishes without nagging? I have your answer!

Go buy a Bosch dishwasher! :)

I kid you not, since we bought this dishwasher a couple of weeks ago, Oronzo has been downright eager to do the dishes!

The other night, when we were discussing what to make for dinner, he wanted to go with the option that created the most dirty dishes so he could fill up the dishwasher! How crazy is that?

This dishwasher is really neat. It's got lots of bells and wistles, adjustable wracks, attachable extras to keep your silverware from falling off, and to keep small parts in place. It has an internal heating element so if a small part were to fall to the bottom of the dishwasher, it wouldn't melt.

Best of all, our dishes have never looked so sparkling clean! We used to have to wash our dishes to wash our dishes, using the dilapitated dishwasher that came with the house we bought 2 years ago. Now, we throw in our dishes with only scraping off the chunks and it really works!

One of the huge selling points for Oronzo was the fact that it's one of the quietest dishwashers on the market. It's so quiet that if it weren't for a built in red laser, we wouldn't know it was running! Hooray!

Granted, this dishwasher isn't the cheapest on the market, but it's worth every penny that we saved for the past 2 years to purchase it (we paid with our debit card, not our credit card)!

So getting my spouse to do dishes by purchasing a Bosch works for me, maybe it'll work for you. To see what works for others, be sure to check out the other links at Shannon's, the creator of Works-For-Me Wednesday!

My past WFMW entries:

the Plate Method
free steak seasonings/marinades
bargain shopping tips
My-Calorie-Counter
free customized ring tones
party favor basket
10 ways to make brushing fun!
Crayola Twistables Slick Stix
kids car organizer
stop urban legend emails
send credit scores soaring
foolproof extra creamy cottage cheese
stainless steel ball whisk
Uses for your child's wagon
10 Reasons Why Parents Should Not Spank
Love Sweet Love
travel tip
free children's printables
calendar labels
Strawberry Spinach Salad
mesh laundry bag uses
12 lbs 'til Christmas
toddler healthy eating techniques
reindeer puppet
Grocery Game website
No Fear Shakespeare
list of age appropriate children's chores
linking within comments
baptism gift
creating blogger categories
alternate use for pot rack
cake decorating tips
unique way to stay connected
cake baking tip
comforts of home while traveling
quenching the thirst of your little one
pie crust made in bulk
hot chocolate kicked up a notch

Labels: my toys, Oronzo, product review, Works-For-Me Wednesday

Well, we survived Snuggle Bug's first full day in daycare yesterday.

Snuggle Bug cried and screamed when Oronzo dropped him off yesterday morning. Oronzo headed to work feeling horrible.

Later, I called the daycare and checked to see how Snuggle Bug was doing. The director said he had cried for about 10 minutes and then a 4-year old little girl, Jade, asked him to play and he was distracted. He didn't cry again the rest of the day.

Snuggle Bug spent the day playing with the building blocks with two little boys his age. He had fun playing outside, especially on the slide. He took a nap when it was time (clutching tightly his pillow, bunny, and blanket), although he took a while to get to sleep. He was too busy looking around at first. He even ate the meals served.

Thanks again, everyone, for your supportive comments and prayers! It's hard to express how much that's meant to me!

I'll keep you all posted on how he does this week.

When I arrived to pick him up, he'd just woken up from his nap and was standing near his little sleeping mat. When he saw me walk in the door, he raced across the room and threw himself in my arms. It felt so good to hug him close to me and know that he was safe!

Snuggle Bug was a bit quiet a first when we got in the car. He asked, "Where Daddy go?" I explained that Daddy was still at work and would be home in a couple of hours.

I took Snuggle Bug for a walk in his stroller and then he helped me pull weeds in the front yard. When Oronzo arrived home, Snuggle Bug didn't rush to greet him. Oronzo had to swoop him up for a hug and kiss. Fickle child. :)

So, yesterday was a slight relief from our worries. I'll be the one dropping Snuggle Bug off at daycare later this morning. I'm not looking forward to that! Picking him up is so much more enjoyable.

Labels: daycare, faith, family, Oronzo, Snuggle Bug

In exactly 2 hours, Oronzo will be dropping Snuggle Bug off for his first full day of daycare. It's going to be brutal on all of us!

Last Thursday Oronzo took Snuggle Bug into the daycare and, for the first time, dropped him off for a trail run of a couple of hours. Snuggle Bug sobbed when he figured out Ornozo was leaving. Oronzo said he felt as though his heart was being ripped out of his chest. We learned that Snuggle Bug cried off and on the entire 2 hours there. We felt horrible about it!

Friday Oronzo took him again for another short drop off. This time, Snuggle Bug began sobbing the minute they pulled into the daycare parking lot. He started screaming as Oronzo walked in with him and Oronzo had to literally peel Snuggle Bug off of him to hand him over to the teacher so that he could leave. Oronzo called me from his car on the way out, near tears himself, telling me he's not sure this job is worth what we're putting Snuggle Bug through. He said he felt like a failure as a father! Although my heart was breaking, I encouraged Oronozo to hang in there and give it a bit of time to see if eventually Snuggle Bug was able to adjust and enjoy himself.

I called the daycare center on Friday about an hour after Oronzo dropped Snuggle Bug off. I spoke with the director and learned that he had been crying off and on but the class did a painting project and that captured his attention so he stopped crying to participate. She told me at that very moment he was sitting on the floor playing with another boy and building blocks and he wasn't crying. That made me feel a little better.

When Oronzo arrived to pick Oronzo up on Friday, he looked in the window and watched for about 5 minutes as Snuggle Bug played with containers of water that the teacher had set out for the kids. He wasn't crying and seemed to be doing okay. When he noticed Oronzo in the window, he about bowled over the other kids in his efforts to throw himself in Oronzo's arms as quickly as possible.

Today...well I fully expect today to be ugly. Oronzo will be starting a new job that he's not sure he should be doing anymore, since this transition to daycare is proving to be so difficult to his family.

Oronzo will be dropping Snuggle Bug off at 7 a.m. and I'll be picking him up at 2:30 p.m. I pray with all my heart that Snuggle Bug will survive an entire day there without us. I pray that the teacher will follow my list of "Snuggle Bug instructions" that I typed out and left to be posted in his classroom. I'm sure they think I'm a crazy, overprotective Mama to have made a list, but I don't care. I want them to know his preferences (i.e. he must have his blanket, pillow, and bunny at naptime or he'll flip out and he needs sunscreen and a hat each time he goes outside to play because he burns easily).

Anyway, thank you all for your supportive comments and prayers last week. I can't tell you how much I appreciated each and every one. I've been so stressed out about all of this that it brings tears to my eyes just thinking about what we're putting our baby through.

It's only temporary. It's only temporary. It's only temporary.

Please keep us in your prayers! We desperately need them this week.

P.S. To the ladies who participated in last Friday's Favorite Ingredients Friday recipe exchange, I was spending every precious moment with Snuggle Bug this past weekend so I haven't had the time yet to look at all your recipes. I will try to get that done one night this week. Thanks so much for your participation!

Labels: daycare, faith, family, Oronzo, Snuggle Bug