Monday, October 30, 2006
Adoption #2- ongoing research
Oronzo and I have decided that we need to look at more than just Catholic Social Services as an option for our next adoption. Neither of us are overly impressed with their professionalism. We're not getting the warm fuzzies and for something as important as this, I think we need to have a good feeling about the agency we're working with. We haven't totally disregarded CSS, we're just continuing our research.

So, today I ripped out a page from the Yellow Pages phone book. There's only 1 page in our city for adoption services. There's a bigger city about 2 hours from here that probably has many more agencies, but we want to start locally and see what we find.

One listing in the yellow pages really disturbs me. Here are the details:

Silver Spoon Adoptions
Providing Families of Distinction & Privilege, Doesn't Your Child Deserve the Very Best?

Yikes! Does this mean they only work with very wealthy prospective adoptive families? To me, this ad smacks of condescension and coercion!

Of course, I will be calling them to see what they have to say. We're far from a family of distinction and privilege so they'll probably not give me the time of day, but I simply have to hear their sales pitch. I plan on asking them a lot of questions regarding how they treat the expectant mother, see if I can't make them squirm a bit.

The other ads seem fairly benign, although many of them stress the paid living and medical expenses for the potential birthmothers (I have mixed feelings about this) and none of them say "potential" birthmother or expectant mother in their ads. No, they consider them birthmothers even before the baby has been born. Rather annoying.

Well, I have some phone calls to make to these agencies so I'll keep this post short. I plan to create a spreadsheet to track and compare what we learn about each agency.

Wish me luck!

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11:01 AM

At 11:56 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Overwhemed with joy,
Have you considered China. We did a ton of research on it and are currently adopting from there. Everyone we know that has adopted from China has had the most amazing experience. There are TONS of blogs to check out people's journey to their chldren in China. It is a very clearcut, precise country to adopt from.

At 1:56 PM, Anonymous Sylvie said...

I am sure you will find an agency that fits your family. When we started our journey we met with several agencies in our area and somehow the one we chose felt right. When I refer people to them I always say what sold me was I liked that our social worker Ann, talked to me and explained things like we were 3 years old! That is exactly what we needed a lot of hand holding and not someone muddling through like it was info we should know, especially with it being our first time.
Good luck!

At 2:07 PM, Blogger Pamela said...

Glad you all enjoyed your family time together at the beach! whoo hoo!

You never know what you might stumble on in your attempts at finding an agency. My daughter almost excepted a job at an agency in Oklahoma, but opted to go a different route.

Our thoughts and prayer are with you always, and best of luck. :)

At 3:43 PM, Blogger Michelle said...

well how frustrating with both of those ads! Hopefully the agencies are much better than the ad seems to represent! I think you're doing the right thing by searching out other options - espcially since you don't get the "warm fuzzies" from the CSS!

At 4:30 PM, Anonymous chelle said...

I totally thin you should have the warm and fuzzies from the agency that may help you find your family!

I adore how much you respect the birth mother and family. The amazing way in which you approach the entire thing leaves me awe.

Totally sending positive vibes your way!

At 7:41 PM, Blogger Brony said...

I think it's good to keep your option open. Things will turn out how they are supposed to.
I'm also glad that you had a good trip. Welcome back.

At 8:09 PM, Blogger Barb said...

I DO wish you luck. I don't like the sound of either of these.

I can't imagine your frustration, OW. I think it's time for me to add you to my prayer list. And that, my friend, I can do. Immediately.

It's unbelievable to me that people like you and Orenzo have to go through this to simply adopt a baby and give him a wonderful life full of love.

Admittedly, I'm very naive about the whole process. Still, I hate that it's so difficult for people like you.

At 9:43 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

My long comment got deleted (argh) but the short version is that we discovered too late that while we were happy with our agency's first priority being first families, we needed just a little bit of handholding, so do take care in choosing (we found the right combination in our intl agency).
As for Silver Spoons, the name says it all. How awful and incorrect to assume that that's what mothers want for their children! Argh.

At 8:33 AM, Anonymous Jenna said...

Silver Spoons? Yikes. What a name.

At 9:39 AM, Blogger Blessed Assurances said...

God has a baby waiting for you-I pray that He lead you to the right agency and gives you a peace that passes all understanding. Keep me posted!

At 11:13 AM, Blogger Tammy and Parker said...

You've got a good plan in place. Keep us updated concerning how things go.

And I agree......Silver Spoons for an adoption agency?


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Name: Overwhelmed

My complete profile

It wasn't supposed to work this way...Parts 1 through 10

(the story of the private, domestic adoption of our son)

(Part 1)
(Part 2)
(Part 3)
(Part 4)
(Part 5)
(Part 6)
(Part 7)
(Part 8)
(Part 9)
(Part 10- Adoption Finalization)

Fostering isn't for the faint of heart!

(our journey to adopt again through foster-to-adopt, the good, the bad, & everything in between)

Adoption #2- considering the State
More Adoption #2 thoughts
Adoption #2- Back to considering the State
Adoption #2- The Paperwork (Round 1)
Adoption #2- The Paperwork (Round 2)
Family Foster Home Licensing Prep Checklist
Adoption #2- Long overdue update
PS-MAPP class homework assignment
Our preliminary home inspection went well!
Adoption #2: Licensing update
Adoption #2- Foster Facts
Adoption #2: I love it when things go my way!
Adoption #2- The home inspection
Adoption #2- We failed our home inspection!
Adoption #2- We passed the follow-up home inspection!
Adoption #2- Still waiting
Adoption #2- We're getting closer
Adoption #2- An update & a lead
Adoption #2- The lead that didn't pan out.
Adoption #2- We're licensed!
Adoption #2- We have a tiny baby here!
Adoption #2- Update on this precious little girl.
Adoption #2- Quick update on Baby Bug
Adoption #2- Baby Bug is staying longer!
Adoption #2- Baby Bug is growing!
Adoption #2- Overdue update on Baby Bug
Adoption #2- The latest on Baby Bug
Adoption #2- Shopping spree for Baby Bug
Being a Foster Parent Does Not Make Me A Saint
Adoption #2- Another Placement Call!
Adoption #2- Placement Meeting- UPDATED!
Adoption #2- We have Boo at our home!
Adoption #2- Meeting Boo
Adoption #2- I'm angry on Boo's behalf!
Adoption #2- A Birthday Party for Boo
Adjusting to three 3 and under!
Stressful moments in fostering.
Adoption #2- Update on our foster daughters
CPS Workers Jerking Our Chain!
It's getting much worse!
Fostering: Update on Baby Bug
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Good conversation with Baby Bug's dad.
Boo has a Permanency hearing coming soon!
My heart is breaking!
Bittersweet news about Baby Bug.
Next Friday is going to be tough.
Packing up Baby Bug's belongings
It's done- Baby Bug is gone.
Working on finding peace, one day at a time.
Referral to the Early Intervention Program
Baby Bug update
Home Inspection for re-licensing
Parole granted for Boo's bio mom
Baby Bug is turning 1 year old soon.
Day 2 of Boo's permanency hearing
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