Fair warning, this is going to be a long post.

Thing have been stressful these past couple of weeks in our household and it probably won’t get any better for another couple of weeks.

Last week I was away on business and during my time away Oronzo was left to take care of all three children on his own, 24/7. Let’s just say that things did not go well. Baby Bug is teething and she went from waking up only once per night for a feeding to waking up every couple of hours screaming in pain. Oronzo tried to sooth her quickly but there were a few times when her cries woke the other two children up. Oronzo got very little sleep the entire week.

Boo regressed back to feeling very anxious every time Oronzo would set her down and try to get something done. She would start sobbing and try to get him to hold her. Snuggle Bug was pretty self-sufficient but his needs still had to be met too. On top of the chaos with the children, Oronzo was desperately trying to get work done in the evenings for a project he’s trying to complete for a client. He failed miserably to meet that deadline and had to request an extension.

When I returned, Oronzo felt at the end of his rope. When I asked why he didn’t ask for help he explained that the help he needed the most was in the evenings and no one was available for that.

Unfortunately, I’m leaving on yet another week-long business trip this coming Monday. Usually my trips aren’t back to back like this but I can’t get out of going on this next trip. We thought that Oronzo’s mom would be able to come and stay with him for the week to help out with the kids but she informed us last weekend that she was no longer available, at all. We’re not even sure why but we feel like she’s left us hanging because she originally told us she would be able to help and now suddenly she can't.

Oronzo made it clear to me that he could not have a repeat of last week. He’s still behind on work and desperately needs to catch. As foster parents, we don’t have a lot of options when it comes to getting help in the caring of our foster children. To have someone watch the children for even an hour, they have to be fingerprinted and have a background check done. To watch them overnight, they have to be a fully licensed foster family. What this means is that Oronzo is going to have to put Baby Bug and Boo in respite care next week.

When he told me this, I panicked. Boo has enough separation anxiety issues as it is. Sending her to a strange home for a week surly will only make it worse. I’m sure she’s going to think we’ve left her for good! Baby Bug is a happy little baby and probably will be fine, as long as the foster family that’s caring for her gives her lots of love and attention. I confess that I pleaded with Ornozo not to do this and even went so far as to try to make him feel guilty about even thinking of it. I wasn’t very supportive of his admission that he was feeling overwhelmed with taking care of all three children by himself the entire time I was gone. My lack of support has led to strained feelings between him and I.

It took me a couple of days to accept that respite care is the only option for this next trip. I called our agency worker and filled her in on the situation. I started crying as I spoke with her. She was quick to reassure me that it was OKAY to ask for help and said that she understood that the restrictions placed on us on who can watch the foster children makes respite care unavoidable in these situations. She assured me she’d find a good family to take the girls. I requested that she try to find foster parents with no other children that would take both girls and that could give them their undivided attention.

Our agency worker appears to have come through for us. She found a couple that is just doing respite only and will have no other children in the home next week but our two girls. I called and spoke to the foster mom and we talked for about 30 minutes. I shared with her my concerns and she assured me that she’d take good care of them for us. She offered to let me come to her house ahead of time to get a tour and to get to know her and her husband a little better so I’m taking the girls tomorrow morning to meet with her. She’s okay with me giving her notes on the girls’ needs and sending a list of the items we’ll be leaving with them.

I’m still quite apprehensive about sending the girls to respite care and I think Boo will struggle with this even after she’s back home with us next Friday afternoon, but I’m trying to be respectful of Oronzo’s need for assistance. I’ve apologized to him for not being more supportive in the first place and the tensions are easing a bit. Now I just want next week to be over so I can get back to taking care of my family!

Who knew that business travel would prove to be so painful! You're prayers for our family next week would be much appreciated!

Labels: business travel, foster children, fostering, Oronzo, parenting, stay-at-home daddy, working mommy

Itsy Bitsy Lollipop Bow Clippie (mine is purple)

Butterfly Bow Clippie (mine is a classic single bow, in a pretty apple green)

Frog Princess Whimsey Bow Clippie (this is my absolute favorite!)

If you haven't already visited Lily Cait's website you really need to hurry over there and check out all the lovely goodies they have to offer!

Thanks Lily Cait for your generous gifts! I can't wait to use them on our little girls.

Labels: baby products, giveaways, product review, winners

It's time to pick two winners for my March Pay It Forward Book Exchange. I've used Random.org to find my winners.

And the winners are...

# 2- Tisa a non-blogger who wins Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides.

# 16- Lindsay at On Shades of Gray who wins Hope's Boy: A Memoir by Andrew Bridge.

Congrats, Ladies! Please email me your mailing addresses so I can send you your books next week! If I don't hear from you soon, I'll have to pick another winner.

And for those of you who didn't win my giveaway, check out the additional books still up for grabs this month!

My next Pay It Forward Book Exchange will be held on Tuesday, 1 April.

Labels: bloggity goodness, books/reading, giveaways, Pay It Forward, winners

Happy Wednesday to you! It's time once again to post another WFMW tip!

I don't know about you but as much as I love participating in this WFMW exchange, sometimes I can't think of any decent ideas. So, unless Shannon requests a specific theme, I've decided to focus my efforts on offering craft ideas. And I'd love it if you'd leave me a comment with some craft ideas of your own!

This week I'm sharing a musical instrument craft idea. It's quick, easy, and your child is sure to love it after they've helped you make it! I know Snuggle Bug loves his.

Noisemaker

Supplies Needed:

papertowel tube
string or yarn
5 beads
markers or stickers for decoration
hole punch

Directions:

Punch five holes around one end of a papertowel tube. Cut five pieces of string or yarn(each piece 5 inches long).Tie each piece of string or yarn to each hole. Tie one bead onto the other end of each piece of string or yarn. Decorate the tube with markers or stickers.

Creating a noisemaker works for me. To find out what works for others, be sure to check out the other links at Shannon's, the creator of Works-For-Me Wednesday!

My past WFMW entries are found here.

Quick note: This Friday I'm hosting a Favorite Ingredients Friday- Easter Edition II recipe exchange.

Please join me in sharing the recipes of dishes or drinks that you might find yourself preparing for your Easter dinner!

Labels: kids crafts, Works-For-Me Wednesday

As a contributor over at BloggedIn- News & Networking, I just highlighted an excellent post entitled, What does contentment look like?

Please, go check it out and leave Sally of Sally's Words some comments to let her know what you thought of her post.

Twice a month I search through the posts of bloggers who are part of Family-Friendly Network looking for a special one to highlight. If you're not already a member, you might consider joining! It's a great group of bloggers!

If you are a member and have a post you'd like highlighted in the near future, leave me a comment or send me an email with a link to that post and I'll check it out!

Labels: BloggedIn Highlight, bloggity goodness

I've been absent from blogging for over a week, but I'm alive! My absence wasn't planned, things just got busy. Oronzo's mom, Alezia, visited last week so when I wasn't at work I was spending time with her each evening. Entertaining her and keeping track of our three little ones didn't leave me any time for blogging.

I'm amazed at how much more time consuming 3 children (3 years, 13 months, and 4 months) are than two. How do you parents with 4+ children manage? I have so much more respect for you now!

The kids are doing great. Snuggle Bug is still displaying signs of jealousy from time to time but he is doing better. Oronzo and I are working hard to make sure he gets his own one-on-one time with us at various times throughout the week. We make him share with Boo a lot, but there are times when we tell him he doesn't have to. If there are certain toys he absolutely doesn't want to share, we ask him to take them into his bedroom and close the door so Boo can't get to them. And when Snuggle Bug takes a toy away from Boo that he doesn't want her to have, we've gotten in the habit of telling him, "Okay, if you don't want her to have that toy, can you find her a toy that she can have?" He will scan the room, grab a toy, and bring it to her. We still have to referee Snuggle Bug and Boo but it's not nearly as demanding as it first was.

Despite the feelings of jealousy, it didn't take Snuggle Bug long to take to Boo. I just love watching them play together and Snuggle Bug will often go out of his way to engage Boo in play. Snuggle Bug is the first up in the mornings and in the mornings or at nap time he often asks, "Where Boo go?" and assure him that she's just in bed sleeping.

Boo loves Snuggle Bug! She tries to follow him (she's walking more than she's crawling now but she's not very quick because she falls down a lot) and she is constantly imitating him. When we're driving around in the car, Boo and Snuggle Bug are chatting up a storm and laughing with each other. Boo truly seems happy in our household. She's adjusted very well!

Baby Bug is also doing well. At four months she's much more vocal and is almost able to roll over. She's a beautiful baby and such a joy! We'll sure miss her when she returns to her parents. I have quite an update on that but you'll have to wait until tomorrow. Snuggle Bug is quite protective of Baby Bug and very attentive to her needs. Boo really doesn't interact with Baby Bug much, other than to steal her blanket or bottle or pull out her hairbows when she's sitting next to her in the car. Boo is surprisingly gentle around Baby Bug, she just likes to take things from her, maybe to make up for the fact that Snuggle Bug likes to take things from her. I'm learning there is definitely a pecking order when you have more than one child. :)

Okay, that's all for now. I have to go eat some breakfast and then get in to work. I'll have more blog time this week because I'm actually in Ft. Walton Beach, FL this week! I'm working at Eglin AFB through Friday. I have to say, I'm rather excited to be spending a week in FL. My work load shouldn't be too heavy and I'll have time to do shopping, blogging, and sleeping since I'm away from the family. Poor Oronzo is left alone to deal with the three kids 24/7 while I'm gone. I'll have to make it up to him when I return home.

Labels: Baby Bug, Boo, family, foster children, foster-to-adopt, fostering, Snuggle Bug

Ingredients:
1/4 cup butter
3 cloves garlic, chopped
1 1/2 pounds medium shrimp - peeled and deveined
4 tablespoons tequila
3 tablespoons fresh lime juice
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon chili powder
1/4 cup chopped fresh cilantro
1 lime, cut into wedges

Directions:
Melt the butter in a large skillet over medium heat. Add the garlic; cook and stir for about 30 seconds. Add shrimp; cook until they start to turn pink, about 3 minutes. Pour in the tequila and lime juice and season with salt and chili powder. Simmer until the liquid has evaporated, about 3 more minutes. Pour shrimps on a plate and garnish with cilantro. Garnish with lime wedges. Serve with rice or in a tortilla wrap!

I hope if you try this recipe you'll let me know how it turned out for you! Now I look forward to seeing your Favorite Ingredients Mexican Food Dishes recipe!

Don't forget to link your specific recipe post link on Mr. Linky so I can see what's cooking at your house!

Oh, and be sure to put the title of your recipe in parenthesis! It makes it so much quicker for me to go back and search for recipes as I build my weekly menu.

Labels: bloggity goodness, Favorite Ingredients Friday, recipe exchange

5 Minutes for Mom is once again hosting their annual Ultimate Blog Party. I love this because it's an opportunity to get to know bloggers that you may never have met otherwise! There are already lots of great bloggers participating so I hope you can join us!

For those of you who may not know me, let me give you a few quick highlights:

* I'm a proud adoptive mom of a magnificent 3-year old son, Snuggle Bug. My husband and I were recently licensed for foster care (on 11/8/07) and we already have two beautiful foster daughters in our home (Baby Bug, 4 months, and Boo, almost 13 months). Going from a one-child household to a family of 3 young children in 3 months has been a bit hectic and crazy but we're quite happy!

* As you might suspect, this blog is focused on adoption. If you'd like to read more about our private adoption of Snuggle Bug, check out my 10-part series, It wasn't supposed to work this way. To read about our personal experiences thus far of trying to adopt through the foster care system, check out my posts with the Adoption #2 category.

* In addition to my adoption and parenting related posts, I like to keep things interesting on my blog by hosting various carnivals. Each Friday I host my Favorite Ingredients Friday recipe exchange. On the first Monday of each month I host my book exchange Pay It Forward book exchange. I've got one going on now. Check it out, there are several free books up for grabs! I'd love it if you'd consider participating in either one of these carnivals! Every other Tuesday I co-host the Highlights section at BloggedIn News & Networking. I'm on the lookout for fabulous posts to highlight, so drop me a line if you have one in mind.

* You have probably figured out that I blog anonymously. I'm very protective of my family's privacy so I rarely post pictures and never post identifying contact information (names, locations, etc.). Still, if you'd like to see what I look like at my finest, check out my wedding anniversary post to see one of my favorite wedding pictures of my husband and I. We were married and honeymooned in Ireland! I'm part Irish and getting married in Ireland was a dream come true. The pictures you see as the focal point of my blog design were taken in Ireland by my very talented husband during our honeymoon.

Enough about me, have you seen the fantastic list of prizes to be won at this year’s Ultimate Blog Party? It's hard to narrow it down but here are my top three picks:

1) The free blog design offered by Sweet 'n Simple Design (for the home-based business I want to start).
2) The custom tutu offered by Live~Love~Dance (for my little girls to play with).
3) The $25 gift certificate offered by Lily Cait (for hair accessories for my little girls).

And if my top three picks are already chosen, I’d love any of the following (in order of preference): 50, 77, 70, 20, 45, 11, 12, 15, 8, or anything else related to babies and young children since we now have 3 little darlings in our home!

Thanks for stopping by! Please leave me a comment so I can stop by and visit your blog as well! And if you haven't already, go visit the 2008 Ultimate Blog Party and get linked up.

Labels: bloggity goodness, Ultimate Blog Party

Happy Wednesday to you! It's time once again to post another WFMW tip. Once again Shannon is doing a Backwards Day edition where you ask for advice, rather than give it.

So, I need help figuring something out. How do you nip older sibling jealousy in the bud? Let me give you some background info.

Snuggle Bug has been an only child for nearly 3 years. Then along came our first foster daughter, Baby Bug. At nearly 4 months old, she isn't much of a threat to him. In fact, Snuggle Bug adores her. Sounds good, right?

Well, then along came our second foster daughter, Boo. At 12 months old, she is much more of a "threat" to Snuggle Bug. He is having a difficult time sharing his toys and sharing his mommy and daddy with her.

We understand that Snuggle Bug has had a lot to adjust to and that he hasn't had any time to get used to the idea of a foster sibling. But what can we do to help him cope and to diminish the sibling rivalry?

Any suggestions would be much appreciated. Thanks!

To see what advice others need, be sure to check out the other links at Shannon's, the creator of Works-For-Me Wednesday!

My past WFMW entries are found here.

Oh, a quick note:

Labels: Works-For-Me Wednesday

UPDATE: The winners of my books were announced right here. My next giveaway will be held on Tuesday, 1 April. Please join me again then!

It's time for another one of my free Pay It Forward book giveaways!

For those who may have missed out, please read about the guidelines right here.

So, I have two books to give away this month.

1) Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides.

Editorial Review by Amazon.com:

"I was born twice: first, as a baby girl, on a remarkably smogless Detroit day in January of 1960; and then again, as a teenage boy, in an emergency room near Petoskey, Michigan, in August of 1974." And so begins Middlesex, the mesmerizing saga of a near-mythic Greek American family and the "roller-coaster ride of a single gene through time." The odd but utterly believable story of Cal Stephanides, and how this 41-year-old hermaphrodite was raised as Calliope, is at the tender heart of this long-awaited second novel from Jeffrey Eugenides, whose elegant and haunting 1993 debut, The Virgin Suicides, remains one of the finest first novels of recent memory.

Eugenides weaves together a kaleidoscopic narrative spanning 80 years of a stained family history, from a fateful incestuous union in a small town in early 1920s Asia Minor to Prohibition-era Detroit; from the early days of Ford Motors to the heated 1967 race riots; from the tony suburbs of Grosse Pointe and a confusing, aching adolescent love story to modern-day Berlin. Eugenides's command of the narrative is astonishing. He balances Cal/Callie's shifting voices convincingly, spinning this strange and often unsettling story with intelligence, insight, and generous amounts of humor:

Emotions, in my experience aren't covered by single words. I don't believe in "sadness," "joy," or "regret." … I'd like to have at my disposal complicated hybrid emotions, Germanic traincar constructions like, say, "the happiness that attends disaster." Or: "the disappointment of sleeping with one's fantasy." ... I'd like to have a word for "the sadness inspired by failing restaurants" as well as for "the excitement of getting a room with a minibar." I've never had the right words to describe my life, and now that I've entered my story, I need them more than ever.

When you get to the end of this splendorous book, when you suddenly realize that after hundreds of pages you have only a few more left to turn over, you'll experience a quick pang of regret knowing that your time with Cal is coming to a close, and you may even resist finishing it--putting it aside for an hour or two, or maybe overnight--just so that this wondrous, magical novel might never end. --Brad Thomas Parsons

I'm not suprised that this book was chosen to be a part of Oprah's Book Club! It was good and I had a tough time setting it down.

2) Hope's Boy: A Memoir by Andrew Bridge.

I was given this book by one of my co-workers. Since it was a memoir from a former foster child that aged out of the system, I started it immediately and had it read within two days of receiving it! It really liked it and I think you will too!

Editorial Review by Publishers Weekly:

In this memoir of a decade spent in foster care, Bridge illuminates the horrors of a system that, in its clumsy attempts to save children, he argues, all too frequently condemns them to physical and emotional abuse. The child of a teenage mother who divorced her abusive husband soon after Bridge was born, he watched helplessly as his mother disintegrated under the impact of isolation and poverty. At the age of seven, Bridge was dragged away from his mother, literally, by police and warehoused in an enormous California juvenile facility patrolled by armed guards. The state eventually transferred him to a foster family dominated by an obese, bullying Estonian woman who had survived imprisonment in Dachau as a child. At 17, as he prepared to leave foster care for college and freedom, Bridge finally had a reunion with the mother he never stopped missing. In his narration of this unending nightmare, Bridge shows particular skill in portraying his isolation and the defenses he constructed to survive it. He also has a talent for grotesques, particularly that of the monstrous foster mother who revisited the misery of her upbringing on her foster children. Bridge's obsessive focus on his loneliness and his two mothers is so intense that a more balanced picture of his life fails to emerge and his attachment to another foster child remains unexplained. Yet Bridge, a Harvard Law School graduate who has devoted his career to children's rights, has provided remarkable insights into a dark corner of American society.

If you'd like to win either of these books, here is what you must do:

1. On your blog, write a post about this giveaway, using my "Pay It Forward" button, and then link back to my post. I am sure your readers would appreciate learning about the chance to win a book. You must complete this step to be put in the drawing, unless of course you don't have a blog!

2. Sign the Mr. Linky (the Mr. Linky is that list of names at the end of this post - just type your name in the box) with your name and the specific URL of your PIF post. Note: If you are not a blogger, you may still enter to win. Just sign your name on the Mr. Linky without a URL and then email me your contact information. Please note on your email that it is for the PIF book giveaway.

I'll announce the winners on Saturday morning, 22 March, so be sure to check back.

Best of luck!

If you have any books you'd like to Pay It Forward yourself this month, please leave me a comment and I'll link you in this post!

Additional Pay It Forward Giveaways:

1) Kathleen Marie at The Open Window is giving the book, Highland Legacy, which is actually 4 stories in one book, on 24 March. Stop by her blog to enter to win. Thanks, Kathleen Marie!

2) Paige at Yes, I would really like to be thin is giving away the book, An Abundance of Katherines by John Green on 30 March. Stop by her blog to enter to win. Thanks, Paige!

3) Nikki at Angels of Heart is giving away the book, Shoot the Moon by Billie Letts on 31 March. Stop by her blog to enter to win. Thanks, Nikki!

Cloudscome at a wrung sponge gave away the book, The House of Djinn Suzanne Fisher Staples on 14 March. Thanks, Cloudscome!

Cynthia at Springmont Cottage gave away the book, The Amen Sisters by Angela Benson on 16 March. Thanks, Cynthia!

Betsy at The Homeschool Way gave away three books to one lucky winner, Lady’s Big Surprise by JoAnn S. Dawson, Star of Wonder by JoAnn S. Dawson, and A Star Discovered by JoAnn S. Dawson on 21 March. Thanks, Betsy!

Tamy at 3 Sides of Crazy gave away the book, Purity in Death by J.D. Robb aka Nora Roberts on 31 March and I was her winner! Thanks, Tamy!

Labels: bloggity goodness, books/reading, giveaways, Pay It Forward